Week One on the Alien Planet

This will either be verbal diarrhea or a semi-meaningful stream of consciousness. I've been home for a week.

Sometimes it's rough here, because I don't really have any friends here yet. Essentially, I've been away from my hometown for 5 years (college and Ecuador) so I have to kind of resettle and establish my life again. My younger sister (always at work) doesn't really talk to me...I don't know why.

I am doing the job hunt. It's a job in itself. I'm looking for either an ESL-teaching job or a writing job. It's extremely difficult and frustrating, but I try to keep a sunny outlook. It's been a little over a week since I've been home and these things take time. Still, I don't want to be that 23-year-old bumming it at home. So I clean the house a lot.

I also ride my bike a lot. It's wonderful biking through Center City. I go up and down the Parkway and LOVE Park and all the craziness and culture of the city. Can't wait to hit up the art museum as well. I also found a church here I really like; I signed up for a sort of church community day in which we all share our skills. I'm thinking of giving a mini Spanish lesson! I also joined a book club and writing circle at my local library. I hope through that to meet some people my age and hopefully some friendships. Plus I love books. And writing.

I have started doing some little sketches, which is good. I need to get back into that. It makes me feel good to produce something. I'm exploring with a kind of '60s look right now-flat planes of color and simple forms. I guess sort of similar to what your parents' wallpaper looked like in the 1960s...?

I'm still having stomach issues (although not as bad as my gross sickness my last week in Cuenca); I don't know what's up, but it's uber-annoying. I have a stomach ache almost every day. I don't have a doctor's appointment for another 3 weeks...

I am enjoying the weather. It gets dark around 9:00pm, and it's very hot here. The humidity is starting to kick in. But my arms and legs are finally exposed to some sun! I love watching the sunsets at around 8:30-8:45 at night...so beautiful. And I finally got my delicious Indian and Vietnamese food.

I haven't spoken with my Ecuadorian neighbors yet. They're often out and about, but I think their young daughter had another baby...

Sometimes I feel as if I'm the only person with a brain around here, but I remind myself not to get frustrated with where I live. It's a bad neighborhood, but there are bright spots if you keep an open mind. People still play baseball in the field across the street and my neighbors are nice, even if they are rowdy. They respect my father, which is important to me because he does a lot of good for our neighborhood. Yesterday, there were 6 cop cars in front of the house across the street; I'm pretty sure the people who live there are selling drugs on the sly (my neighborhood has a serious problem with drugs, but thankfully, not guns.)

I'm looking forward to a trip to the shore in late July. We go to Wildwood. It's tacky and fabulous. More on that in a future post.

 I spoke with one of my best friends, who told me that 2 people we graduated with are getting married in August. That still kind of blows my mind...I'm getting older, but have I finally reached that age where my peers get married??? WEIRD. I see my twenties as a time of...just floating. My other best friend and I talked about that the other day. While I have to say this the most to myself, I believe that this decade of my life is meant to be about learning, exploring, discovering, and most importantly, messing up. Even though there are plenty of times when I'm so frustrated with myself for not knowing WHAT I WANT TO DO, I need to remember that that's okay. How many people knew what they were going to dedicate themselves to at 23-years-old? Probably not that many. Most people move through jobs, work their way up and through life and everything that comes with it. Sometimes it seems as if every day I wake up with a new mindset. Is it true that as long as you're moving and doing something, you're progressing? Just don't remain idle, just being. An art professor in college once asked us if we were human beings or human doings. I'll let that juicy nugget marinate in your mind for a while...mostly because I need to wrap my head around it myself.

Mom in Cuenca

My fabulous mother did a fabulous thing and made the journey from Philadelphia to Cuenca to see me. I then took this opportunity to get fabulously sick. As in the bucket-by-the-side-of-your-bed sick. To spare the icky details, I must commend my mom for sticking by my side through that 2-day ordeal. I felt terrible (physically) but also emotionally, due to the fact that my mom came all the way to South America to watch me lay in bed for 48 hours. I suppose that's what moms do though, right? They love us and take care of us and want to be with us even when we're not at our best. Thanks mom!

Going to the doctor for a full physical is one of the many things on my list of things to do upon returning home. I fear that the amoeba I detected a few weeks ago in my system has made a comeback, or invited his friends over.

On a more positive note, my mom and I were able to enjoy Cuenca for a few days. We spent a morning riding the city tour bus, which took us around the old and modern parts of Cuenca as well as to the look-out point, Turi. We learned about some cultural history of Cuenca and got some nice photographs for the folks back home. I was also sure to show my mom the bustling markets full of food, clothing, and everything you could possibly never want. We rounded up gifts for family and friends and took advantage of the dry spells during the day, although the rain made many appearances, which was to be expected.

We got a nice treat when we visited Piedra de Agua, a spa in nearby Baños. Some may wonder how great a spa in Ecuador can be, but this was actually very nice. My mother treated herself to a facial, which used volcanic mud, and she was very pleased with it. I joked that she had to travel all the way to Ecuador to get her first facial. As for me, I put a birthday gift to good use, and did the spa circuit with my gift card. My absolute favorite was the mud bath...just soaking in an outdoor mud pit, rubbing volcanic mud all over my skin, which now feels like a baby's bottom. It was great! There were also thermal pools, which were a welcome refuge from the chilly mountain air (not too chilly, but I'm always 20 degrees colder than everyone else.) Technically, I was supposed to sit in the thermal pool for 10 minutes and then switch to the freezing-cold pool for 1 minute. Eh, no thanks. I also bypassed the cold shower part before the steam room, naturally. Even with all of my “cheating” it was a nice way to spend the afternoon, and I'm glad that my mom got some pampering as well. She deserved it more than me.

Her birthday was on Friday (June 13^th) so I surprised her with High Tea at the Alcazar. This is the same mansion/hotel where we celebrated a double birthday (me and my housemate) in February. The gardens are among the best in Cuenca, and the tea was fantastic, complete with the typical dainty food and tea you would probably equate with an English tea. I invited some mature friends to accompany my mom and housemates and me, and it was an unforgettable birthday for my mother. It was certainly something we've never done together before. It was special, as it should have been, for her.

All in all, it was just so great for my mom to finally see and actually live in the place I've called home for the past 9 months. It was difficult being away from my family and familiar surroundings for that length of time, and my mom's never been abroad, so this was a unique experience that we had the privilege of sharing with each other. It's a special bond that just the two of us can share, an eternal link that we'll always remember and have to remind us of all we have to be thankful for. Your mom's still your mom, even when you're on another continent. 

Dia de Nino

Today is the Day of the Child here in Cuenca. I discovered this when I spotted clowns and balloon animals outside. The vast array of ice cream could've been a hint, but ice cream is so commonplace here in Cuenca that I didn't suspect anything. Those Cuencanos love their ice cream...

Anyway, it doesn't surprise me that they have a day dedicated to children; kids seem to be very treasured here. It's a common sight to see toddlers waddling along in child-sized ponchos, or to spot women swooning over their babies, swaddling them in layers of thick fleece blankets. The folks of Cuenca are almost as bad as me: they think it's cold even when it's 70 degrees outside.

On the other hand, I've seen things here that have certainly raised my eyebrows when it comes to childcare in Ecuador. For example, on two occasions, I've seen a woman breast-feeding while riding on a motorcycle. I've also seen a parent allowing their 4-year-old to steer the car in active traffic. And just the other day, my friend saw a man cradling a less than 2-year-old child in one arm while maneuvering a car with his other hand. I'm pretty sure you'd get arrested for that back home.

Even so, children are an important part of life here; families are usually on the larger side, with parents having three or more kids. The times are a-changing, with the more well-off families having two parents working outside the home, leaving the kids freedom to idle around. Among the indigenous and less financially-stable households, children accompany their mothers to work, whether that means sitting on the dusty floor of a mercado, running along the sidewalk while mom tends to the local tienda, or strapped to the mother's back while she sells fruits and vegetables on the corner. The women here have some incredible manner of wrapping a child up and tying them to their backs that I still can't figure out. Somehow the child never falls out of the tied wrap-around shawl, and even more than that, sleeps comfortably! I've also been amazed and saddened by the women who walk around all day long, doing chores and work duties, a child strapped to their backs, while dressed in traditional clothing (full skirt, hat, little high heeled shoes, and sweaters. Some women have bowed legs or serious foot ailments from all of this...

Where are their husbands, you may ask? “Working”...or throwing dice and playing cards.

Also, babying your offspring doesn't end at age 18 like back in the States. Grown men are mama's boys more often than not. It is no big thing to have a 30-something-year-old man go to his mother to ask permission in making some kind of decision, be it leaving the city for a weekend or buying a television or car. I've noticed that male children get special treatment also, with mothers doing laundry, preparing meals, and cleaning up after their sons, while the daughters are stuck helping the mom.

Just another cultural difference I've experienced here in Ecuador. Ever since I made my decision to fulfill my one-year contract and head back home, a wave of relief has washed over me. Don't get me wrong; Ecuador's great, and I'd visit again. I just don't think I'd stay here long-term. It's the perfect place for some people, but not for me. Thinking about it though, I do not regret coming here, not at all, never! This experience has been so wonderful...I've grown in so many ways, and I've learned things here that I would still be mulling over in my head back in the USA. Ecuador is another chapter in my life; a long one that would fall under the category of travel-adventure-turned-memoir-of-a-gringa.